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Time to cram, Giants

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Nothing like cramming for a final exam, as I was just saying to my 20-year-old college self.

The Giants are staring at the July 30 trading deadline like the proverbial student who has spent the entire season asleep in the back row, only to wake up hearing the teacher droning: “And 90 percent of your final grade will come from the final exam …”, thus engendering a massive panic in your gut.

Credit: Darren Yamashita-USA TODAY Sports

The Giants have 11 games between now and the 3 pm deadline on July 30. Starting tonight in Denver, they have:

— three in Colorado 

— four in Dodger Stadium (gulp)

— and four vs Colorado at Third and King (including a Saturday doubleheader, for the love of 1975)

At 47-50 as of this scribbling, they are a whopping four games back in the loss column behind the holders of the second and third NL wild cards, the Cardinals (50-46) and the Mets (49-46).

Perhaps just as problematic, there are three teams between the Giants and those precious wild card holders: the Diamondbacks (49-48), the Padres (50-49) and the Pittsburgh Paul Skeneses (48-48). As if that wasn’t enough traffic to approximate your morning Bay Bridge commute, the Reds are also 47-50 to tie with the Giants, and Elly de la Cruz just swiped another bag while I typed that.

That’s a long way of saying, the Giants need to win A LOT MORE GAMES THAN THEY HAVE BEEN WINNING, if they want to make anything of this season. In other words, they have to turn into a team that they have not been in the first 97 games. Generally, a team shows you who they are after the first, oh, 100 or so ballgames. But here we are, as gullible and hopeful as ever, believing that the Giants can change their identity. 

What’s the old saying: A tiger can change his stripes, if only he wishes hard enough? Naw, that’s not it. 

Here is the only path to where the Giants should not sell at the trade deadline: In those 11 games, go a *minimum* of 7-4. 

That would put the Giants at 54-54 going into a two-game set vs. the soon-to-be Sacramento A’s and at least put them in the “Don’t Sell” category, because it would theoretically create an interesting August, and really, that’s all we ask in this trail of tears called life.

How does a team go a *minimum* of 7-4 when four of those games are against the Dodgers? 

There are only two acceptable answers: 

  1. You are playing seven games against the Rockies, and you have no choice but to beat up the 34-63 Rockies.
  2. Blake Snell must continue to be Second Half Blake Snell, and win two of those games, and the long-awaited Robbie Ray somehow enters the chat and must win a couple of games, too. 

I know. Counting on Robbie Ray to save the Giants before the trade deadline seems a lot, considering we don’t even know what uniform number he wears, or have ever even seen him in a Giants hat.

The cynical among you would say even this “Go 7-4 And Get To .500 and All Is Well” scenario is a far cry from a parade down Market Street, and you’d be right.

But what do you want for nothin’, veal cutlets?

The mission is clear before July 30. The Giants must buy the Cliff Notes for the lectures they missed, hire a tutor, mainline No-Doz and study all night. Passing the class at the last minute is the only way to stay in school.